Greatest Misses

The first thing you hear as a writer is that you should always carry a notebook with you so you can jot down all your ideas – and not one of those overpriced Moleskine ones you just buy to look cool either, one you actually plan on using regularly. So for a good while, I did just that. It was during this time that I realised that most of my ideas were far too odd and offensive to feature in any publication. Here’s a sample of a few.

• ‘Denise Richards: what happened?’
• ‘Can you still play the race card?’
• ‘Can we stop pretending Michelle Obama’s attractive?’
• ‘Black guys with relaxed hair: a visual timeline’ (I might still do this one)
• ‘From cheap bastard to frugal genius: the rise of the money-saving expert’

I could go on, but you get the point.