Retro Inactive

I broke out a new pair of Air Jordan XI lowtops the other day, which isn’t noteworthy, I guess, except the fact that I purchased them in 1996. Along with two other pair. One is still in the attic and the other fell apart last year. I just don’t do reissues. Not because they aren’t good or anything. The technology is surely better, and let’s face it: the fake Fives are still doper than the LeBrons or Melos. But because they are, at their base level, phony offerings so you can relive my youth.

I have no interest is giving you youngsters an opportunity to enjoy the same crap I did when I was your age. I lived and bought my way through the Golden Age of kicks: Barkleys, Foamposites, CWebb 2’s (still the greatest non-Jordan ever released, in my opinion) and bought so many great shoes the day they came out. I waited on lines. Serious lines.

Dunks, Air Force Ones, Vandals, and so forth. Brand-new and ours for the taking. (Russ remembers, right?) On the downside, my back hurts when I sneeze. Translation: I’m old. Yet occasionally I can still muster that romantic notion of first-on-my-block.

Last year, on a pretty cold, rainy Saturday I lined up outside of Nort-Recon because Nike was releasing a shoe that was only being sold in one store in the US, and only 86 pair at that. The fact that they were a buck-eighty-five, and I was up to my eyeballs in free kicks was not lost on me. But I wanted them and didn’t feel like calling in a favor (just after asking for Lobster Dunks and AF1 KAWS) so I chilled out there for three hours with people half my age. When I finally got inside, I bought a pair of size 13’s, which was the largest size that Nike had made in the style.

I am actually a size 14. Chew on that for a while.